Statement Analysis: Lost Pet

The following was a recent conversation I had with someone.  I had been thinking about "What would I say if I had accidentally shot my wife?" as we do, in Statement Analysis.  It is the "Expected"; that is, what we expect to hear.  Then, thinking of an example that, although only with a pet, was still something that bothers me, though almost 2 years have lapsed.  Some readers are familiar with Clancy the Bull Mastiff that we had.

Please note that 2 years have passed and my family has talked a great deal about Clancy.

 I said,

"I killed my dog."

Listener:  "What?  You killed your dog?"

It hurt me to even say it.  Even though it has been almost 2 years, the words startled me.

"Yes.  Clancy was a wonderful dog and I wanted him to live a long and healthy life.  I walked him every day, keeping note of how far we went up the hill, and how much energy he had when we returned.  Over the course of a few months, we lengthened our walk.  Between this, and making fresh chicken, and other healthy foods for him, he was in phenomenal condition.  His coat was brilliant, his eyes bright, and he was a happy, bouncy, lean 160 lb bull mastiff! I wanted him to outlive what the experts say about longevity and bull mastiffs."

Listener:  "So, what happened?"

"On that day, I waited until the sun went down because even though it was not hot, it was very humid.  I knew to be careful with him, as a giant breed. I think it was at least 10 degrees cooler that day.  We got to almost to the top of the hill when his breathing became loud and he pulled over to the side and laid down in the grass.  I pet him on the head and let him take this break.  When his breathing got louder and more labored, I ran home and got him water."

Clancy suffered a heat stroke.

I spent a lot of time mourning him, and considerable time comforting my family.  We love Dex, but we still talk about Clancy and what he would be like today.  We had him on the "All Natural Diet" (as Dex is, too), and I had carefully lengthened his walking distance, weighed him monthly, had plenty of fresh water, and gave him large beef bones which kept his teeth pearly white.  (Far more health issues come from teeth issues than most pet owners realize).

What is the purpose of this post?

Some of you have already cued in on my statement, using Statement Analysis, and likely can guess where I am going.

I felt terrible guilt over losing Clancy.  I felt even worse guilt looking into Christina and Sean's faces knowing how they had him since he was 7 weeks old.

Yet, what is missing from my statement?

As I spoke about him, I thought of what happened, and still felt guilt.  Yet, even in follow up questions about him, I did not use the word "accident" in any form.

Why not?

It is because I didn't intentionally kill him, and I did not feel the need to say that to my friend, asking about Clancy.  I was responsible.  Even though it was cooler, the sun was down, and the walk was shorter than just the day before, I was responsible.

Yet, I felt no need to explain it was an accident.

Next up, Domestic Violence.

The Georgia Bureau of Investigation reported that they interviewed shooting victim Maggie McCollum and reported that she was asleep when she was shot by her husband, police chief William McCollum.

The word they used?

"Mrs. McCollum thinks it was an accident."

It is very likely that the word "think", which shows weakness, was used by Mrs. McCollum.

If you were asleep and your husband shot you, what would you say?

In a loving relationship, where no prior Domestic Violence has existed, (which includes threats), would you say "It was an accident" even if you were asleep?

Take a look at my statement again.  What do you see in it?

Listener:  "So, what happened?"

"On that day, I waited until the sun went down because even though it was not hot, it was very humid.  I knew to be careful with him, as a giant breed. I think it was at least 10 degrees cooler that day.  We got to almost to the top of the hill when his breathing became loud and he pulled over to the side and laid down in the grass.  I pet him on the head and let him take this break.  When his breathing got louder and more labored, I ran home and got him water."